The first weeks in a care home: what to expect

By · Published 2026-09-18 · Last reviewed 2026-09-18

A smiling group of older friends sit on a bench in a colourful flower garden.
Photo: Allan Henderson, CC BY 2.0

Most people need several weeks, and sometimes a few months, to settle into a care home. Expect an unsettled start, a care plan that staff build and adjust as they get to know your relative, some paperwork about benefits and fees, and possibly a trial period written into the contract. Visiting regularly, sharing their routines and life story, and raising small problems early all help.

The first weeks in a care home are usually the hardest part of the whole move. Expect your relative to be unsettled for a while, expect staff to ask a lot of questions while they build a care plan, and expect some paperwork about fees and benefits. Most people do settle, but it takes weeks rather than days, and families need time to adjust too.

What happens on moving-in day and in the first few days?

The home should already have assessed your relative before offering the place, so staff will know the basics. In the first days they fill in the detail. You can expect them to:

Many homes register new residents with the GP practice that visits the home, particularly if the old surgery is some distance away. Ask what the arrangement is, and make sure any hospital appointments, dentist, optician, chiropodist and hearing-aid services know the new address.

What to bring

Age UK suggests photos, soft furnishings, favourite music and books to make the room feel familiar, and says some homes will also allow a favourite chair or other small pieces of furniture. Its page on moving into a care home is a useful short checklist. Label clothes, glasses, hearing aids and dentures clearly: things do go missing in a busy home.

How long does it take to settle into a care home?

There is no official figure. It is normal for the first few weeks to feel rocky: your relative has lost their own front door, their routine and often some independence at once, frequently after an illness or a hospital stay. Being tearful, withdrawn, angry or asking to go home are all common reactions and do not by themselves mean the home is the wrong one.

Good signs include eating reasonably well, sleeping better, recognising one or two staff, joining in with something (even just sitting in the lounge), and being a little less distressed when you leave.

If your relative has dementia

A move is harder for someone who cannot hold on to the reason for it. They may ask repeatedly to go home, or not recognise the room as theirs. Comfort, familiar objects and a steady routine usually help more than arguing the facts. Give staff a written life story: where the person grew up, their work, family names, what calms them, what upsets them, how they take their tea. Age UK notes that staff should learn about the person, for example by using a memory book.

Alzheimer's Society publishes a free booklet, Supporting a person with dementia in a care home, with practical tips on helping someone settle and staying connected, and on the emotions both of you may have.

What should the care home be doing in the first weeks?

Building a proper care plan

Every resident should have a written, personal care plan. In the first weeks it is a working draft: staff learn what your relative really needs at 3am, not just what was said at the assessment. Ask to see the plan, and ask to be involved if your relative wants you to be, or if you act for them under a power of attorney. A good plan covers preferences as well as tasks. Age UK's guidance is that if someone likes to eat lunch in their room or have a lie-in at the weekend, staff should aim to fit in with this.

It is sensible to ask for a sit-down review with the manager or key worker after four to six weeks.

If the council arranged the place

In England, where the local council arranged the placement, the statutory guidance under the Care Act 2014 says councils should consider a light-touch review six to eight weeks after the care and support plan is agreed, and should review plans at least every 12 months. You can also ask for a review at any time if things are not working. Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland have their own review arrangements through the council or the health and social care trust, so ask the social worker what to expect.

Respecting the contract and your rights

The Competition and Markets Authority's guide to consumer rights for care home residents and their families applies across the UK. It says homes should give you key information before you move in, including fees, what is included, and details of any trial period. It also says you should usually get at least 28 days' notice of changes to fees or terms, and at least 28 days' written notice if the home asks a resident to leave, which should only happen for valid reasons and after consultation.

Is there a trial period?

Often, yes, but it is a matter for the contract rather than a legal right. Many homes write in a trial period of a few weeks during which either side can end the arrangement with shorter notice. Check:

If the council arranged the place, the contract is usually between the council and the home, so ask the social worker how the early weeks are handled.

Can we visit whenever we want?

In most homes, broadly yes. Visiting is now backed by law in two nations.

In England, a fundamental standard known as Regulation 9A came into force on 6 April 2024. Care homes must facilitate visits to residents, and must not discourage residents from going out on visits, unless there are exceptional circumstances. The Care Quality Commission (CQC) oversees it.

In Scotland, regulations known as Anne's Law came into force on 31 March 2026. They require care homes to allow and support visiting, and let residents name essential care supporters. The Care Inspectorate oversees them.

In Wales and Northern Ireland, the regulators (Care Inspectorate Wales and the RQIA) expect homes to support contact with family and friends. Ask the home for its visiting policy in writing.

How often should we visit at first?

You may be told to stay away for a week or two "to let them settle". That is a suggestion, not a rule. Alzheimer's Society says that seeing family and friends regularly can make a big difference to a person with dementia after the move. Short, frequent visits tend to work better than long ones. If leaving causes distress, try going just before a meal or an activity so staff can take over, and ask how your relative is ten minutes after you have gone.

What happens to benefits and money?

This is the part families most often miss in the rush.

This is general information, not financial advice. Rules change and circumstances differ, so take independent advice, for example from Age UK, Citizens Advice or a regulated financial adviser who specialises in care fees, before any decision you cannot undo.

What if it is not working?

First, separate settling-in from real warning signs. Unhappiness, homesickness and refusing to join in are common in the first weeks. The following are not part of settling in and should be raised at once:

How to raise a concern

  1. Speak to the key worker or nurse in charge the same day. Most early problems are fixed this way.
  2. If it is not resolved, put it in writing to the manager and ask for the complaints procedure. The CMA guide says homes must make it easy to complain and must not threaten to restrict visitors or ask a resident to leave because of a complaint.
  3. If the council or NHS arranged the place, tell the social worker or care coordinator as well.
  4. If you are still unhappy, the NHS page on care homes explains that in England you can go to the Local Government and Social Care Ombudsman, which looks at adult social care complaints however the care is funded. In Wales it is the Public Services Ombudsman for Wales, and in Northern Ireland the Northern Ireland Public Services Ombudsman. In Scotland you can complain directly to the Care Inspectorate.
  5. If you think someone is being harmed or neglected, contact the adult safeguarding team at the local council (the health and social care trust in Northern Ireland) straight away, and call 999 if someone is in immediate danger.

If the home simply is not the right fit, moving again is allowed. Give it a fair trial first, but a poor match does not have to be permanent.

Looking after yourself

Relief, guilt and grief often arrive together, sometimes in the same afternoon. Alzheimer's Society notes that feelings of guilt are not unusual when a relative moves into a care home. You are still their carer in the ways that matter: you know their story, you notice changes, and you speak up for them. Many homes run relatives' meetings, and the Age UK, Carers UK and Alzheimer's Society helplines offer someone to talk to.

Frequently asked questions

Should I stay away for the first week so they can settle?

You do not have to. Some homes suggest it, but there is no rule, and regular contact with family usually helps. Try short, calm visits, and adjust the pattern with the staff's advice if it clearly causes distress.

My mother keeps asking to go home. Does that mean we made a mistake?

Not necessarily. Asking to go home is one of the most common reactions in the early weeks, especially with dementia. Reassure her, avoid arguing, and tell staff so they respond in the same way. If distress is not easing after several weeks, ask for a care plan review.

Can the care home put the fees up soon after moving in?

Fees can only change in line with the contract. The CMA's guidance says residents should usually get at least 28 days' notice of changes. If your relative's needs turn out to be higher than assessed, the home should explain that before changing the fee.

Do we need to change GP?

Often, yes. Many homes are covered by a local practice that visits regularly, and the old surgery may not cover the new address. Make sure records and repeat prescriptions transfer without a gap.

Key takeaways